How to Create a Self-Care Routine That Actually Works

Let’s be honest: we’ve all made a self-care plan and then… completely ignored it.

Maybe it felt like too much work. Maybe it didn’t feel like you. Or maybe you were simply too overwhelmed to follow through. You're not alone — and you're not doing it wrong. You just need a routine that actually fits your life, not the one you think you should be living.

As a life coach and wellness counsellor, I see people struggle with this all the time. Here’s how to build a sustainable, personalized self-care routine that works — and sticks.

1. Redefine What Self-Care Means to You

Forget the bubble baths and green smoothies (unless you genuinely love them). Self-care is anything that replenishes your energy, restores your balance, and helps you feel more like yourself.

✅ Ask yourself: What helps me feel grounded, calm, or capable?

Your answer might include movement, rest, quiet, creativity, connection — or something else entirely.

2. Start with Micro-Rituals

Big routines can feel overwhelming. Start small.

• 2 minutes of deep breathing before bed

• A daily check-in with your feelings while you drink your morning tea

• Stretching for 5 minutes after work

• Stepping outside to notice something beautiful

Small, consistent actions are more powerful than occasional big efforts.

3. Use Anchors to Build Consistency

Pair your self-care habit with something you already do.

For example:

• While brushing your teeth → say an affirmation

• After your morning coffee → take a 3-minute mindful pause

• Every Sunday night → plan your week with intention

Anchoring new habits to existing ones makes them easier to remember and integrate.

4. Create a “Resilience Toolkit”

List the activities or supports that help you get back to center when you’re stressed or struggling.

Your toolkit could include:

• Calling a supportive friend

• Taking a walk in nature

• Journaling prompts

• Breathwork or grounding exercises

• A playlist that shifts your mood

Knowing what works before a hard day hits is a game-changer.

5. Drop the “All or Nothing” Mindset

Self-care isn’t a checklist you fail. It’s a practice of tending to yourself.

Even on your hardest days, doing one small thing is enough.

Instead of asking:

“Did I do my whole routine? ”Ask:“ Did I care for myself in some way today?”

Final Thoughts: Choose You, Consistently

There’s no one-size-fits-all when it comes to self-care. What matters is that your routine fits your reality — and supports your wellbeing without adding pressure. What works for you one day may not work the next day. Give yourself permission to have options. Maybe alternate a self-care routine so that it involves different activities.

✨ Want help designing a routine that truly supports your life? Book a clarity session with me — I’d love to support your journey. ✨